Sage Advice from a Birth Mom - Considering placing your baby for adoption?



I pulled this question from a guest blogger on the Birth Mother Baskets website.  Thought provoking wisdom from a woman who knows.

Q.  What advice would you give to expectant parents who are considering placing their baby for adoption?

A.  Research the crap out of your options!  There are difficult stories out there of adoption going wrong, and there are amazing stories out there of adoption going beautifully well.  Become familiar with them all.  But also know that the final choice is yours how you want placement to go, or if you decide to parent.  There is no easily wrapped up and convenient standard to what open adoption “is”.  It is truly a case-by-case situation and what has worked for other’s maybe won’t work for you.  I think it’s important to familiarize yourself with the good and the bad so that you know what questions you need to ask your prospective adoptive parents.  They are hard and potentially uncomfortable conversations to have, especially as you are just getting to know each other, but the conversations are vitally important. And ultimately, if you decide to place, at the end of the day it is your decision to sign the dotted line; make sure that you are doing it for the right reasons because there will always be “what-ifs” in the future, and it’s important to remember that it was your decision.  If you feel you are in a position where you are being forced one way or the other, then turn to someone you trust to advocate for you. 

Childconnect.com for Birth Parents

Childconnect was designed to maintain the connection between birth parents and adoptive families. There’s no longer the worry about updating your address after each move or fear you’ll lose precious photos of your child.  Birth Parents have easy and lasting access (up to 18 years) to their pictures, letters, emails, etc. sent by the adoptive family.

Childconnect for Adoptive Parents and Birth Parents

Childconnect has the ability to manage multiple adoptive children from multiple birth parents under a single adoptive family account. The system automatically creates Lifebooks for adoptive families to upload pictures, videos, letters, and documents for their birth parents to view. Adoptive families, birth parents, and agencies communicate through a secure communication messaging system that protects both the parents.

I'm Pregnant, Now What?

You find out you pregnant. 

There is a jolt to your system. 

Your world has changed. 

What can you do? 

What should you do? 

If you can’t speak with your family, who can you speak with in confidence?  

Who will listen without judging? 

Those are legit questions. 

Take a step back, take a deep breath and know you aren’t the first woman to be in this position. That means there are other women who know what you are going through.  Listing to their stories and experiences may help you to decide what is best for you. 

We can put you in touch with those women – email me

We can put you in touch with those women – email me

Childconnect.com & Birth Mother Baskets

Birth Mother Baskets {bmb} is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization that delivers gift baskets to birth mothers who have recently placed their babies for adoption.

Their baskets contain unique, high quality, hand picked items that are made to pamper a birth mom. bmb is a gift from one birth mother to another that offers hope, support and courage.
CAIRS Proudly supports this organization. 
If you are an Adoptive Parent we encourage to visit their site and send a bmb to the birth mom in your life.
Click here to visit their site

Childconnect.com - automatically generates photos and lifebooks



The system is centered on the concept of a Lifebook. These custom Lifebooks contains letters, pictures, documents, and videos that are shared between parties.  In addition, the system automatically generates Lifebooks based on the agreements reached between the parties so everyone knows what is due and when.  Childconnect also facilitates confidential communication between the parties, freeing agencies/attorneys from having to be the go between.

Adoptive Parents and Foster Parents

Adoptive Parents and Foster Parents can upload photos, videos and documents and publish albums to birth parents, from the comfort of their home. ChildConnect also sends alerts for important deadlines through emails or text messages.